By Figen Genco, BA.
Phase 3: Eliminate the Unnecessary
Eliminating the Unnecessary covers four areas:
1. Eliminating the unnecessary behaviors
2. Eliminating the unnecessary objects
3. Eliminating the unnecessary people
4. Eliminating the unnecessary events
Through careful thinking and decided action with help of EFT, you can free up a lot of time and space, and have peace and happiness in your life.
1. Eliminating the unnecessary behaviors
There is a story about a cooking a holiday ham. The mom is busy in the kitchen preparing a holiday ham, and her son is watching her. He sees her cutting both ends off the ham before placing it in a baking tray. He asks, “Mommy, why do you cut the ends of the ham off?” His mother answers, “That’s how my mother always did it.”
So the boy calls his grandmother. “Grandma, why do you cut the ends of the ham off before you bake it?” “That’s how my mother always did it.” The young boy calls the great-grandmother. “Great Grandma, why do you always cut the ends of the ham before you cook it?” She answers, “Because it doesn’t fit in my pan.”
How many extra steps are you taking while you do things just because you assumed it is the right way to do it?
Tap with:
Even though I always ___ (fill in the blank) because Mom, Dad, etc. told … taught … showed me so, and I have never thought of trying different ways…
I never questioned its validity, and even sometimes this caused conflict between my spouse and me, and I argued that mine is the correct way to do it; I love and forgive myself for not being open to the new ways and possibilities.
2. Eliminating the unnecessary objects
There are two categories under the heading of unnecessary objects. The first category is the old clutter from many years before. These types of objects are stored mostly in the attic, in the basement, in the storage facilities, and sometimes in the garage. Dealing with this kind of clutter is a very hard and common challenge, so it will be explained in depth in Phase 7 of this article series.
The second category of the unnecessary objects consists of things that occupy our active space and have no value or function in our current lives. When these things linger around long enough, they become “old clutter.” They get packed during the first move, and never leave those taped-shut boxes in the following many moves. They cover our space, gather dust, and waste your time and energy, whenever you move them around to open up more space for more of it!
Tap with:
Even though I know that I will never use these leftover materials from the craft workshop I took last month, I can’t bring myself to get rid of them…
I paid all this money for them and for the workshop, so I feel guilty if I get rid of them.
Maybe if I find someone who interested in the same hobby, I might not feel so bad about letting them go. This way I will have more space in my room for my current hobby.
3. Eliminating the unnecessary people
Some people always seem to have something negative to say. Regardless of who and what they are talking about, listening to them, or even just being in the same environment pulls you down to their energy level unless you are very grounded.
You might find yourself depressed, less productive, and upset when they leave. It is best to eliminate these kinds of people from your life, or if that is not possible avoid encounters with them as much as you can. And according to Feng Shui traditions, opening up space symbolically and literally frees up space for the new things that you wish in your life. So you can have the type of people you want in your life by letting go of the ones you do not need.
Tap with:
Even though I am tired of listening to my friend ___ gossip about other people…
I love and forgive myself for not wanting to visit/hang out with my ___ anymore.
It seems that every time we go out, my energy is drained. She keeps complaining about her ___ and I am tired of listening.
I love and forgive myself for letting ___ misuse my kindness and keep asking me for constant favors. My other friends tell me he is using me but I just cannot say “No”. I accept myself anyway.
Maybe if I practice in front of the mirror about saying No to him, I might be able to do it nicely.
4. Eliminating the unnecessary events and activities
Sometimes people get into things with different expectations, but they turn out to be very useless events.
Tap with:
Even though being involved with this committee has been nothing but headache and waste of time, I still can’t leave. I choose to forgive myself anyway. Maybe I am just afraid of what others may think if I leave.
Then maybe I will tap on my fear of others’ judgments, leave the committee and do something better with my time.
I love and forgive myself for not being able to get out of this volunteer work I was pulled into. It doesn’t seem to work the way they explained from the beginning and I have lost my belief in it.
Now I am embarrassed to say that I want to leave. I accept myself anyway.
Even though I think I have to register my kids every activity that all the neighbors’ kids are attending, then I have to drive them every where and they complain and I have no time to do anything, I accept myself.
Maybe I can let children be children and do nothing for a change. I can relax and they can relax!
Figen Genco, BA.
EFT/Feng Shui/Organizing Consultant
About the Author
Figen Genco, Integrated and Intuitive Consulting 215 354 0275 www.lovethewayyoulive.com